The first time I came to have a look around and meeting everyone and seeing everything, I just instantly was like this is what I want to do. Like I instantly knew. I just feel safe here and I find it hard to trust people, especially people like in authority or whatever, but I instantly trusted everyone who works here, and I want to say everyone else who is here with me. So that’s quite rare for me, like trusting like people very quickly, but yeah, I very quickly established that this is a place of trust and like safety. I don’t have much of that outside of this place … or I haven’t had in the past, much places of safety and much like trust, so it’s a breath of fresh air.
I like how friendly and talkative everyone is. Even when I’m … if I’m just disassociating or if I … like I’ve just noticed if people see me kind of just by myself and not doing anything or talking, they strike up a conversation with me and I’m not used to that. I’m not used to people just wanting to talk to me or wanting to know stuff about me or wanting to be part of my life. I don’t know. Do you know what I mean? Like know about me and my life and whatever. Like everyone just … I don’t know, it doesn’t even seem forced. I don’t know. Like therapists or nurses or whatever, they’re kind of trained to kind of forcibly kind of pretend they care, but [people here] they actually care, actually want to know what I did on the weekend and what my hobbies are and what I like to do. It’s not like forced. It’s not like oh this is my job, I have to do it. It’s like everyone genuinely seems they are interested in me and my life and what I have to say and stuff like that. So, I think that’s a big part of why I really like it here. It’s just like how nice everyone is and like I said before, it is a breath of fresh air just being around people who I know don’t have bad intentions or are bad people. Like everyone here is just so nice and are so genuine and it just makes me like relax and not be so on edge and be myself more.
When I had a look around and saw the pottery room, I was so excited about the pottery. I am quite an artistic person, but I don’t get to do a lot of that. So, I was excited to be able to do that. I think as well, just like learning about the success rate of employment afterwards. I would really like to … I don’t have qualifications, I don’t have much previous work experience and I have absolutely no idea what I want to do and who I want to be, so I’m excited to maybe find that out here or be helped to find out what I’m good at and what I could do.
I’ve surprisingly taken a really big interest in the woodwork. I do really enjoy it in the woodwork room. I was asking Graham loads of questions today about how much he paid for the wood and how many boards he got from each wood and how much he would … like how long it takes to make each board and then how much he would sell each board for and what profit and whatever, and I was just thinking just in terms of like business, if it was a small business of doing just these specific chopping-boards…
I think one thing that I’ve noticed is there seems to be a mutual understanding between us that we are like equal to each other. It doesn’t matter what any of us has done because obviously we’ve all done something to be there. It doesn’t matter if some have been to prison and is on day release or if someone, like me, is just on probation, or someone is just coming […] Like we are still equal to each other, no-one is better than anyone else, no-one is worse than anyone else, no-one has done worse than other people because at the end of the day we’re still human and we’re still people…
…there’s a tile in the dining-room that says everyone has a story and I think everyone here has their own story. Everyone’s got a reason as to why they do what they do or whatever and they get the time to think about that, if you know what I mean. So being out in nature and being out … it’s such a beautiful place and being around such amazing people who can also relate to us, because I know a lot of people who work here used to be us, just seeing … like I don’t know, it’s such a … seeing that there used to be just one hut and seeing how much it’s grown and then seeing that a lot of people who work here used to be like us, it’s a symbol of like hope, if you know what I mean. It’s like … they said before I came here … I was pretty ready to give up, pretty ready to be like if that’s what I’m gonna be, if that’s what people think I’m gonna be for the rest of my life, if that’s I just can’t get the help, then I’m just gonna carry on re-offending or hurting myself or hurting other people, then so be it, whereas now, I have that hope of like that’s not who I am and that’s not going to happen and it doesn’t have to be like that.
Also, skills … who knew I was good at woodwork and who knew that these, you know, ex-prisoners are really good at gardening or pottery or you know, like meeting what’s his face, the one-armed potter, meeting him and hearing his story, and now he’s got his whole life…
…and it’s so inspiring that I can work through this and there are people who don’t see us as criminals or see us as bad people, they see us as people who have a story and have gone through a hard time or had no choices or decisions, or mistakes that can be changed or can be made into something great. Like a lot of people who have worked here have gone on to do things from this, like the one-armed potter. Yeah, it makes me feel hopeful and yeah, I’m excited. I love the pottery and I love the woodwork. I don’t know, who knows, maybe I’ve found my calling and I go onto work as, you know, have my own business … selling chopping-boards. I don’t know, probably not, but you know what I mean. It makes me think that I have the possibility, and it makes me think that I can do it and like I have the potential to do those things. Like a couple of months ago I was just so ready to give up.”
A window into LandWorks 