“So I’ve been in and out of prison for the last year, just over a year. I ended up with a restraining order for my mum’s house but she had cancer so I had to keep going back to look after her, which kept getting me re-called to prison. So I ended up with a few unpaid work hours, and my probation worker said LandWorks was a good place to do it.
I hadn’t actually gone to prison ‘til the end of 2024, that was my first time and since then I’ve been back in four times. Once you go in once, every time you go back to court that’s their first option, send you back to prison. It’s just a revolving door, once you’re in the system they’ve got no qualms in sending you back.
It doesn’t do any good for me at all, it just takes me 10 steps back. I’ll make progress, I’ll stop using drugs for a while, I’ll find somewhere to live and then I’ll go back in prison for something stupid like breaching the restraining order when you know, they shouldn’t really be in place at all.
I’ve just got a new place to live. I like it, yeah. I was in a CAS-3 before that … so it’s like emergency housing through probation (Community Accommodation Service Tier 3). When you come out of prison, if you’ve got no-where to live, they can give you like three months in a CAS-3. It just stops you from being street homeless when you get out. It just gives you a bit of time to find somewhere permanent. So the last time I got out of prison I was in another CAS-3, but I never ended up getting around to getting myself a permanent place, so when I left the CAS-3 last time, I ended up back at my mum’s house, where I’m not meant to be, so that’s why I ended up back in prison. So, this time I’ve made sure I stay away from the house. Yeah.
The previous two times I got out with no-where to go, I was just street homeless. The first time I got given a tent off a friend. She used to stay in a tent. The second time, I don’t think I stayed out of jail long enough to be … I think I was only out for like two days and then I went back in again. But it’s probably for the best in a way coz I had no-where to go.
I’ve had a drug problem since I was about 17, like hard drugs, so since then I’ve been sort of back and forth in addiction, but my dad used to be a drug addict as well. I’ve taken a lot of advice off my dad coz he’s been there, so he knows what he’s talking about. Yeah, I used to talk to my dad about it a lot. He came off heroin and methadone and completely turned his life around, turned to religion, yeah. He come off the methadone about 2012, I think, and then he converted to Rastafarianism about 2015. He was devoted to it. It kept him going, so it worked for my dad.
I’ve been in boarding schools and care from a young age, so I always felt a bit sort of left out from the family. I used to experience quite bad mental health episodes, like bad anxiety and depression, so I used to turn to the drugs as an escape really, to try and take me away from it, but obviously that just makes things worse in the long run. So yeah, I’m trying to keep away from the drugs now. I’ve tried a few times, I’ve been in rehabs and I’ve gone onto different medications, but I think this is the longest period … yeah, this is the longest period of time that I’ve managed to stay away from it and coming to LandWorks helps coz it keeps me busy, and then by the time I get home I’m too tired to even think about doing anything else. I went to boarding school at about 10. I was really close to my mum and dad, so I found that really difficult.
I remember the first time I came to LandWorks and I got showed around. I think it was by Chris. I think I was meant to come back the next week for my first day but before I got chance to do that I got sent back to prison again. So yeah, I came to have a look around about five months ago and then obviously I went back to prison for three months. When I got out I didn’t realise that my unpaid work hours like continued ‘til after my sentence. I thought it would’ve just been wiped off but my probation worker said no, you have to do them as well.
I was quite looking forward to coming back. Yeah. I was really anxious about it at first coz I get anxious about meeting new people, and I find it very hard to say ‘no’ like if I don’t want to do something, but I feel rude saying no. I find it quite difficult. Yeah, I was quite anxious about it at first. I do enjoy it. It’s nice … all the friendly people, getting to see everyone when I come in, and speaking to everyone.
I’m hoping to build up my confidence a bit… So I’ve worked in the workshop with Graham making benches. It’s not as hard as you’d think really. Once you get like all the measurements right, they’re quite easy to knock together. But yeah, it’s fun.
Cooking, I’ve been doing cooking the past couple of days, which I’ve really enjoyed as well. I liked walking around all the little greenhouses. Yeah, I enjoyed getting all the ingredients. Yeah, that was good. [Why] Just like making something that you picked out the garden really. It was just nice and fresh, you know. But yeah, I was asking Holly if I’d be able to like get my own little patch or something coz I wanna try and grow a watermelon. I don’t know if you need a certain climate or not … trial and error really. She said she’s planning some cantaloupe melons, maybe. So yeah, see how that goes. I want Steve to let me go on the little mower as well. I wouldn’t mind doing that. I wouldn’t mind making a few things to put in the shop, like chopping-boards or maybe some cups and bowls … just contribute a little bit.”
A window into LandWorks 